Well a lot of people use blogs for lots of different reasons. Most of my friends use them to show family members the latest news on their kids. Which is why I do it for the most part! That is the fun stuff catching them in their moments and writing about the cute little things they say or do!
Today is different though, and trust me there are many things I could be writing about write now. I felt the need to write something different....Today has been a rough day! Acutally the week has been kinda rough. I texted one of my dearest friends to say it has finally hit.... My crazy point during "season!" Ugh! I have been in a funk and dead zone, a very, very tired place! Yelling at kids, not wanting to do laundry, just sick of the house, and winter! Not that I have any right to complain I am not a school teacher with kids bouncing off the walls before Christmas, I am not a college student on the brink of tough exams, I am not even a basketball coach figuring out his team for the umpteenth time this year! Those kinds of stresses are so far from my thoughts. My stresses are all about me! I have been reading a little bit of this book called Crazy Love. In this book it talks about how we are such a small portion of God's Big Plan for this world! Not that we aren't important, WE ARE! Just sometimes we think we are WAY more important than we actually need to be! Make any sense?
I swore up and down that this Christmas was going to be about the right thing! In many ways through talks and stories it has been in our household!BUT.... In my heart it hasn't been so much! I think that's why my week has been so tough. I haven't given God what he wanted most, MY TIME!!! Uh? Why?
Well, I don't really know the answer to that. I just know that when He doesn't get my time, I go into survival "CORTNEY" mode. That mode never gets me far! So here I am confessing that when God is not in charge of my day... IT NEVER REACHES IT'S FULL POTENTIAL!!!! Tonight I hit a breaking point. I don't like those points, but they are great reminders of who is in charge and it's NOT ME!!! THANK GOODNESS! The great thing is the beauty of God is so easily obtainable! It's not like I have to say this extra special prayer, (by the way I am just talking out loud)or put on some special kind of music... none of that! I just have to drop to my knees and say... I CAN'T, BUT YOU CAN.... YOU CAN!!!!!!! PRAISE JESUS YOU CAN!!!!! You are so great and you know all I need and will ever need! PLEASE SAVE ME FROM MYSELF!!!! AMEN!!!
I am alive!
3 years ago
4 comments:
Been at this point and several times during football season....now I get to these crossroads of stress at 2am when I am again with JJ and asking God what did you ask us to do and why is it so hard. You are right that the only one who can get us by is Jesus and He is so faithful. love you sista and will be praying
Cortney - You are in my thoughts and prayers. I love when I get to my breaking point or when God allows me to get there. It's like HE has let us go so far on our own and then HE pulls the reins in! I THANK HIM for always being there when we are READY to just do it HIS way
dear cort,
I love your blog! I am so thankful for who you are! You have no idea! ahhh, you have been such a great encouragement my whole life..
Love you,
Lin Lin
Cortney, Thanks for being honest and real. I so relate with your post. It is awesome that we can share the good with the bad. And still know that Jesus loves us no matter how much we get wrapped up in ourselves. I really enjoy reading what is going on with ya'll. Thanks! Amy H.
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